I was reminded tonight the power of positive reinforcement. Some people feel this means that you don’t correct and everything is feel good you can’t fail, etc. That is not the case. The type of positive reinforcement I am referring to is surrounding a negative with two positives and not allowing kids to get out of control.

For instance, let’s say you are talking in a huddle and you have a kid not listening. You can yell at them to listen, or you can call out their name, sternly remind them to listen, and then ask them, “How are you ever going to learn this stuff if you don’t listen”? Of course they are there to learn, this puts the onus back on them.

How about when a kid boots a ball? Tell them, “That was a great effort, if you had gotten your butt down and in the right position you would have fielded it cleanly, strong throw though!”. The kid leaves this conversation thinking, “Wow, I made a great throw, I can do ever better next time if I get my butt down and field the ball properly”.

I tire of negativity in all facets of my life. It amazes me that we wonder why our kids are so quick to criticize each other. Might we need to take a look in the mirror?

This is something that I struggle with constantly. I have girls in softball and boys in baseball and coaching them is completely different. The younger boys are more like girls, but when they get older it gets tougher. Instilling confidence is key at the younger ages, but there is so much more beyond that.

I am intrigued by the statements in an article on The Championship Coaches Network that goes into great detail about this.

Click here to view the article

I would be remiss if I didn’t point out that I was referred to this article from one of my favorite blogs Life in the Fastlane by Ken Krause

The thing I take out of the article is that girls need confidence building and wish to gain your approval, while boys are cocky by nature and need humbling. Of course this is not an all or nothing situation, but it explains why my softball teams started performing better when I went all positive reinforcement!

What is the biggest difference between coaching girls and boys to you?

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