I was reminded tonight the power of positive reinforcement. Some people feel this means that you don’t correct and everything is feel good you can’t fail, etc. That is not the case. The type of positive reinforcement I am referring to is surrounding a negative with two positives and not allowing kids to get out of control.

For instance, let’s say you are talking in a huddle and you have a kid not listening. You can yell at them to listen, or you can call out their name, sternly remind them to listen, and then ask them, “How are you ever going to learn this stuff if you don’t listen”? Of course they are there to learn, this puts the onus back on them.

How about when a kid boots a ball? Tell them, “That was a great effort, if you had gotten your butt down and in the right position you would have fielded it cleanly, strong throw though!”. The kid leaves this conversation thinking, “Wow, I made a great throw, I can do ever better next time if I get my butt down and field the ball properly”.

I tire of negativity in all facets of my life. It amazes me that we wonder why our kids are so quick to criticize each other. Might we need to take a look in the mirror?