MIA Cheated My Players, My Teams, Myself, and My Dignity
I have never really been the most popular guy on the planet. But, one thing I have always earned, is respect. This past year you may have noticed I have been missing in action here. I used to write every day about what was going on in my life on the field, but I stopped. Why? Because I didn’t want to hurt any feelings.
That’s right. Rick the Giant Ass tried to play nice-nice. And what did it get me? Nothing. The ones I tried to appease left angry anyway, and the ones that stood by and believed in me paid the price. Don’t get me wrong, I had nothing but good intentions.
Had I written all year about the daily activities of the league, my teams, and my players, I would have had to of called out a lot of people for behaving badly. Character would have been questioned, doubt raised, and conflict would have been inevitable. Funny thing is, those same people fought with me all year any way! And now, they have removed themselves from my life. All I did was compromise my principles in order to delay inevitable conflict!
My wife said it best, she said, “Why are you trying to make everyone happy all of a sudden? Go back to being an a**hole and at least then you are true to yourself and your core beliefs”. Wow! Sometimes we simply need a smack in the face don’t we? Don’t get me wrong, I feel that I am a fun loving great guy, but not everyone sees me that way. Go figure.
One of the coaches I respect a great deal told me like this. I asked him how he dealt with the irate, the disrespectful, and those with total disregard for authority. His reply? “I’m pretty much a ‘my way or the highway’ kind of guy”. He added, “I will tell them, ‘yeah that’s one way to do it, but it’s not how we are going to do it here’”. I love it!
Of course this doesn’t mean I am not open to new ideas, creative concepts, and individual motivational mechanisms. In fact, I am the kind of guy who likes to delegate authority and sit back and enjoy how inspiring the human spirit can be! There is nothing better than teaching a kid how to do something and then sitting back and enjoying watching them succeed. The same applies to coaches and parents. But from this point forward:
-I will NEVER compromise my integrity again.
-I will stand strong and believe in all my positions.
-I will be open to new ideas but decisive about whether to institute them.
-I will empower all those around me.
-I will praise extraordinary effort.
-I will not accept sub par effort.
-I will not permit disrespect of any kind.
-I will give those that earn it respect.
-I will not tolerate insubordination.
-I will have a plan and execute it.
-I will be honest and straight forward when delivering information someone may not want to hear.
-I will be true to my players, my league, my team, and myself.
Even with 20 years of experience, it is possible to fall into a self inflicted trap. At least I recognized the error of my ways and hope to never repeat it.
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Rick, you can’t ever compromise your core beliefs. I ran into a similar situation teaching martial arts. Either change the way I teach and make it more like recess and less like a martial arts class, or leave… I left.. no regrets
I have to be able to explain to my daughter about standing up for what your core values are, how can I do that if I didn’t hold fast to what I think is right
Hey Scott,
You are 100% correct and, in hindsight, I wish I had done the same. But, I’m always trying to find ways to bring people together and move forward in a positive manner. As it turns out, the best way to do that is to stand by your beliefs. They have worked now for 20 years, why would I expect them not to in this case? Oh well, live and learn, but life is always one challenges after another. Nobody knows that more than you after your year! Stay true, I will too!