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cheating (Photo credit: Sean MacEntee)

I am always amazed at how little people can think of you. Those with positions of authority can likely relate, but why is this? And why does this come from the same people repeatedly, while others, “grown men” as my Best Friend Sarah calls them, simply focus on the objectives they have at hand. Why do people project themselves onto others?

One of the ones I get all the time is “all you want to do is win.” No, all I want to do is teach kids HOW to win utilizing character traits that will help them throughout the entirety of their life. Winning is not the end all be all, it is the result of hard work, dedication, discipline, and respect for your opponent. Ironically, when I teach kids these traits, suddenly they win more often than not. This makes others REALLY want to beat us, hence, they think, “All he wants to do is win.” We certainly enjoy our success, but rarely do we lose sleep over a loss because a loss teaches more about winning than winning EVER does!

Another one we get all the time is, “he cheats.” Well, EVERYONE who knows me knows I won’t even cheat in a board game! I get mad when my trivia team looks up an answer on Google! Why play the game if you are going to cheat? Well, I guess you would have to ask those who accuse us of cheating, because the concept is foreign to me. What I do though, is know EVERY rule in the entire book so I can use them to our advantage. I also am a student of the game always trying to understand every possible scenario in every possible situation. This gives our team a competitive advantage, a LEGAL competitive advantage.

So why all the drama? I have a theory. When you see drama or experience one of those “huh?” moments, step back and take a look at who it involves. Almost ALWAYS it is the parents with their first kid! The first time through the system, the game means so much, the parents get so into it. By the time they are on their 3^rd or 4^th kid they realize that nothing that happens on the field as far as results means anything. In fact, 98% of it will be forgotten. Ask my 27 year old about a play, he won’t remember, ask him about how disciplined his teams were, he can’t forget.

I don’t mean militant style, though I have nothing against that, I just mean your approach to the game, to practice, from the instant you put on your cleats how you conduct yourself. A fellow board member told me something last week that made my day. He said, “I’ve come to realize that you aren’t the bad guy, you’re just the one that always has to deliver the bad news so you get a bum rap.” I paraphrase.

By far one of the best quotes came from one of the players on our tournament team though. Some of the girls from one of the other league teams were talking about how people say we cheat, (see above) and she said, and I quote exactly! “Yeah, I used to think that too, but after all-stars I realized you guys just have really intense practices and that makes you good.”

A very proud moment, a great life lesson, and the reason I am at the field every night.

integrity (Photo credit: glsims99)

Integrity

Integrity: adherence to moral and ethical principles; soundness of moral character; honesty.

 What is integrity?

Integrity is doing what is right at all times, even when it hurts

Integrity is doing what is right, even when nobody is watching

Integrity is taking a hit for the betterment of others

Integrity is having rules and enforcing them

Integrity is understanding others concerns and addressing them

Integrity is the avoidance of arbitrary exceptions for even those who are closest to you

Integrity is hearing what people say, not disparaging them for what they are saying

Integrity is using power to empower others

Integrity is not using power for selfish reasons

Integrity is believing most men are good, not most men are crooks

Integrity is acting reasonably and not impulsively

Integrity is owning your mistakes and doing everything you can to rectify them

Integrity is saying how can I help you? Instead of, Why would you do that?

Integrity is following the rules at all times

Integrity is insisting those you manage, coach with, serve with, or employ follow the rules at all times

Integrity is not cutting corners, even though you know you could get away with it

Integrity is telling someone you will do something and knowing they are sure you will

Integrity is being consistent in all your actions professional or personal

Integrity is having the same expectation of yourself as you have of those around you

Integrity is being accountable to those closest to you and society as a whole

Integrity is being just regardless of the pressures life presents you

Integrity is offering forgiveness

Integrity is unconditional love

Integrity is returning a wallet full of $100 bills

Integrity is your friends knowing if they call you, you will answer

Integrity is your customers knowing if they call you, you will answer

Integrity is knowing that no matter how far a friend pushes you, they will always be a friend

Integrity is knowing that when I tell you I will be there tomorrow, I will be there tomorrow

Integrity is having a core group of values and then living by them

Integrity is not cheating yourself by cheating yourself

Integrity is closing your eyes and night and knowing you have done everything you can

They offer a comprehensive site that provides you with the latest in science news. They have a section for Biology, Space, Science, and Technology and provide  a news feed with the latest in the world of science.

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I have to admit, I’m not really much of a science geek, but I found myself spending quite a bit of time on SciTechDaily’s site. From spider fangs, to brain oscillation, to NASA, to floating power stations, it was very interesting.

Oh yeah, and I was also able to save $30 on a new car battery!

Junior, Senior & Big League Baseball (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

The results are in and it is official! There will now be an official 50/70 Little League division with a World Series Champion! However, they set it up w/ an odd age breakdown of 11-13. This creates challenges across the board. Before I get to that, here are the rule changes for the league found at this link:

1. Implementation of a new division in baseball, the 50/70 division.
2. Junior Softball division to pitch from 43′
3. Senior All-Star teams can have 16 players and Big League All-Star teams 17.
4. Tournament team names can be released June 15th or 2 weeks before first scheduled game, whichever is sooner.
5. Players who do not meet the 60% minimum play for tournament teams because of illness or injury can be eligible with doctor’s excuse.
6. Tryouts and practices for tournament teams can be held starting June 15th or two weeks prior to the first scheduled game.

None of these rules are really all that significant other than the grandaddy of them all, the 50-70 rule! This creates a dilemma for all leagues. How to structure your league? My first thought is this way:

Senior Division 13-16
Junior Division 13-14
50/70 Division 11-13
Major Division 9-12
Minor Division 7-11

But this creates a conundrum for smaller leagues. Smaller leagues don’t have enough players for a 50/70 AND a major’s division. It is also my believe that Little League wants the major’s division to go away and be replaced w/ the 50/70 division. The 13yo stud can move up to the seniors, but smaller leagues like the one I am part of would essentially have to do away w/ the juniors division at this point if they want a 50/70 division. Would this cause many of the 13yo’s to leave and go play in leagues that allow 13′s to play on 90′ bases? I don’t know.

My next question is, must a league still charter a Major League division IF they are chartering 50/70 divisions? I don’t know. As of now you MUST have a major’s team chartered or have a waiver. I presume you do not. So where does this leave the 12 year old’s at this point come tournament time?

Imagine this scenario which was my first instinct on this one:

Senior 13-16 (Only stud 13′s allowed to move up)
50/70 11-13
Minors 7-11

In this scenario you would have the following potential all-star teams:

Seniors, Juniors, 50/70, Minors

Anyone who played seniors would be eligible for the Seniors and Juniors team. However, ONLY those who played 50/70 are eligible for the 50/70 all-star team. So presume that the all-star team is comprised of all 13′s, now where do the 12′s play? The 11′s can move down the the 10/11 team, but the 12′s are left w/o a team, even though that had been the marquee age for Little League for all of eternity!

Why Little League allowed the 13′s to play down is beyond me, but a league that doesn’t have their 13′s on the 50/70 team does not stand a chance against a team of all 13′s they are destined to encounter in tournament play. This forces the board to either create a team that will never have a chance or create a major’s division as well! A substantial challenge for any organization large or small.

So, at this point, I really don’t know how I would recommend structuring a league that offered a 50/70 program. Do any of you have any suggestions? Certainly together we can figure this out. What do you think? How would you, or how are you planning to structure your programs? I would love to know.

Related articles

• Carve Your Own Path(thelittleleaguecoach.com)

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• Major League Baseball adds two more playoff teams(mercurynews.com)

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New England Patriots linebacker Junior Seau during a game against the Oakland Raiders. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Just like many others my age, I was fortunate enough to watch Junior Seau play football his entire career. He used to make me think of my long lost great high school friend Rob Newton, because he played for the Chargers. See, Rob was from San Diego and a die-hard charges fan. This was during the Riggo time for the Redskins so it was painful to watch his agony while the ‘Skins kept on trucking winning game after game and bringing home super bowl rings. Funny how things change.

 The entire time Junior played, he played with a level of
intensity that is unmatched. He loved life and loved the game. At least that’s what we were all led to believe. In all the coverage I have seen and all the public comments they speak of how his smile could light up a room. How his positive attitude and enthusiastic passion were inspiration for his teammates and employees in his charity efforts. Apparently, it was all a façade.

 This got me thinking. Lately I have seen a number of people
act “out of character”, reacting strangely to normal everyday situations. You know what I mean, doing things that make you go “huh” and walk away shaking your head, discussing with your friends trying to figure out what the heck are they thinking? And more and more I see this. Hmmmmm….

 So then, I thought deeper. Tonight I was around a guy who was
always well mannered and never raised his voice. About five years ago, he started acting erratically and irrationally. Those of us that worked with him often wondered, “What is he talking about and why is he overreacting like that?” In fact, he often didn’t even make sense! It turns out, at the time he was going through a divorce and had three properties upside down. Certainly his every day involved misery and collections calls. This caused him to act erratically.

 So then, I delved deeper. Suddenly, an epiphany! Every week
in my day job, we send out letters to those who have had banks file foreclosure on their homes. Often, we recognize the names that appear as they are friends and associates. Instantly we have one of those, “that explains it” moments. People can only handle so much pressure before they simply crack. I don’t mean go crazy like “One Flew Over the Coo Coo’s Nest Crazy,” I mean just a little nutso.

 Take a moment and think about it. How often do people act
erratically around you? I don’t mean like jerks, I mean over the top, gotta shake your head and say, “what the heck are you talking about” crazy? Jerks are jerks, the people I am referring to are not the jerks of the world, but the normal guys and gals who just seem to suddenly snap!

 And what better place to snap than at your son or daughter’s softball/baseball game? When your child is involved in any way, people seem to overreact more quickly. I assume this is some kind of protection instinct, but
as coaches, we have to deal with erratic behavior at times. It is our job to quash it, not fuel the fire of emotions.

 I do my best to be consistent. I call it “squeaky clean”. If I enforce the rules in the same manner in every situation then people can only be mad at me for not making special exceptions for them. However, if I bend the rules and allow people to break them, then shame on me when they don’t react as I expect.

 So, the next time you have to say to yourself around someone, “what were they thinking”, count to 10 and consider that maybe there is a much stronger force in their life that is causing this behavior. Instead of fighting with them, try empathy, try understanding the root cause of their behavior or at least consider that they may have bigger issues than the one at hand. Especially when the one at hand is so trivial.

 If a person’s reaction far outweighs the levity of the situation, chances are, some outside force is influencing their behavior. As coaches, it is up to us to recognize, understand, empathize, and enforce our “squeaky
clean” procedures. Then, we can rest assured that we have taught proper life lessons to our players, which is ultimately the only thing that matters in youth sports.

Related articles

• Bill Belichick on Junior Seau(espn.go.com)

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• Junior Seau texted his children “I love you” before his suicide(profootballtalk.nbcsports.com)

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Whitney Houston (Image via RottenTomatoes.com)

What does Whitney Houston Teach Us?

I have been trying to relate Whitney Houston’s passing to something a Little League Coach can apply to a life’s lesson. Of course there is the obvious, treasure every moment, stay away from drugs, love unconditionally as often as when we can, but all of you know I like to delve deeper into an issue than the issue typically warrants. I know, it is a horrible character flaw, but I can’t make it stop.

This one for me is fairly easy. I am on my 5^th time through little league and have 22 years experience coaching kids. Every time I feel I have lost my way I look only to my oldest Justin, currently 27 years young. What Whitney teaches us is that in the big scheme of things, none of this really matters! Do you really care if your kids strikes out or hits a home run? If you do, other than how it hurts to see him/her in pain, then you should get your priorities straight.

20 years from now they won’t remember what they did. They are only learning character traits from you. What kind of kids do you want? How do you want them to act? What character are you developing in your children? Are you teaching them to cower in the face of adversity or are you teaching them that when life gets tough, the tough get going? Do you teach them that when things aren’t exactly as you like, you move on to the next best thing? Are you teaching them that dedication, loyalty, and commitment go much further in life than chasing the next great thing? Or are you teaching them that they should always be chasing greener pastures when the ones they have are actually quite ripe with successes!

Ironically, I read today a facebook post from an associate who gave great detail about her “death”. Today six years ago was the day she “died”. But she didn’t die. She was hit by a car going 45mph and didn’t even break a bone! She dedicated herself to making the world a better place. In her post, she states “Through my journey I have found myself, I’m aware of the issues that plague our society and what I as an individual and a leader can do about them. Every breath I take, I can feel”.

“Every breath I take, I can feel”. WOW! So I repeat, does it really matter if Johnny strikes out or hits a home run? Does it matter if Jane walks or scores on a squeeze? A friend of mine the other day texted me, “sorry about that, sometimes I take this stuff to seriously”. Hey, I am not saying you shouldn’t be disciplined, focused, and teaching life lessons daily in your routines. Remember though, you won’t remember if your child won or lost the game, but he/she will be forever shaped by how you react to it.

“and in the end, the love you take, is equal to the love, you make.“

Related articles

• Whitney Houston Dies at 48 (popsugar.com)
• Remembering Whitney Houston With a Look Back at Her Life in Pictures (popsugar.com)

He went on to tell me that he chose not to play high school baseball this year because he felt he had a better opportunity playing on a showcase tournament team than on a high school team. I don’t know, don’t really care either way, that is an argument for another time not fit for an article really, but more a four-hour debate at Mickey Finns.

What did I take from this interaction? First, the kid sought me out because he was PROUD of what he had accomplished. Second, the kid was only a junior! Third, he carved out his own path. He has no idea if he will accept this offer or if he will pursue other offers, but he knows whatever he does, it will be done on his terms, not on anyone else’s! We should all learn a life lesson from this young man!

Every day I hear “you have to do this to get on the high school team” or “you have to do that to get into college” or “you have to play on this team to get onto high school” or “if you don’t play on that team you don’t have a chance to do this or that or the other”. Know what they all are? EXCUSES!

Ever hear from someone who didn’t make a team? Those with egos that don’t allow them to be responsible for their own failures usually say something along the lines of “you have to be friends with him or her to get on the team” or “you have to have played on this team to be on that team”. All wrong. Hell, there are people in our league who say the only way to get on the DeBary Little League All-Star team is to play on the DeBary Dynamite, our tournament team! Nonsense! You really think that the coaches of the all-star, high school, or college team care who or where you played before? They want the nine best players they can get! Period! End of story!

Now, you don’t have to agree with their choices. That is the great armchair debate, but don’t tell me you have to play somewhere to end up on a particular team. That is nonsense! All-star coaches aren’t even paid, so you are going to tell me that a paid high school or college coach cares about anything other than your skills? Their job is on the line! You think they are not going to teach you how to play the game the way they want the game played? One thing any good coach knows is give him an athlete and he will teach him how to play the game.  So pick a coach you think will teach you the most where you enjoy playing and stick with that team!

If you want to play high school, play high school. If you want to play tournaments, play tournaments. If you want to play college, figure out how to get in front of the coaches. Don’t let anyone tell you what to do, do what you want! Nobody can be responsible for you but YOU! Why be miserable somewhere else when you can have fun playing where you want to and STILL get to where you want to go!

So from now on, don’t tell me you have to take a certain path to success. Figure out where you want to go, figure out how you will get there, then execute your plan flawlessly! Don’t let others intimidate or bully you, do it YOUR WAY. As Frank Sinatra said, “I did it mmmmmyyyyyyyy wayyyyyyyyy”.

Related articles

• In All Likelihood, Your Kid Is Not Going To Be The Next Tim Tebow Or Cliff Lee (outsidethebeltway.com)
• Here Are The Odds That Your Kid Becomes A Professional Athlete (Hint: They’re Small) (businessinsider.com)

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